Weather gone berserk.

The wind is blowing here from literally every possible direction and I try to hide in my little second floor hollow as much as possible since any attempts to conquer the weather inevitably end up with me being almost blown off from my bike. Staying indoors is definitely safer.

Although having said that, I left my window open for a little while and ended up with sand/dust being blown into and all over my room, so it's only safe inside if you're prepared not to let any fresh air in.

***

Only a few days till Easter left, but we don't get much time off for this occasion, barely two days (Good Friday and Easter Monday) which is pathetic compared to 6 weeks we get off around Easter at Oxford. In any case, Easter weekend will be so packed! I always try to slow down on such occasions and retain some sanity when everyone else is stressing out about cleaning, shopping and cooking, and this time it might have a different edge to it. I'll probably miss all the cleaning and shopping, contributing to baking more than anything else (well, maybe packing the dishwasher too), but apart from that we'll be doing some exploring with Captain America, so it will be a slow down on a home side and a bit of speeding on having fun side. I definitely need to get away from Leiden somewhere further than Amsterdam to take a deep breath and recharge.

Learning how to learn.

At the start of my degree I was told that I need to learn myself how to learn law. But no one has ever shown me any learning techniques which I could use to figure out for myself how my brain works and what is most beneficial way of studying for me. Instead I was given an example of notes from one of the tutors and that was really it.

Oh, and yes, they told me to study hard.

So now, a year away from finals, I'm finding retaining any information in my memory, and understanding them, increasingly hard. Even land law which I really loved last year seems alien. So in search for help I have turned to a couple of books on memory and an online course.

The course can be found under this link. I haven't had a chance to test what I've learnt yet, and it will only really become measurable during finals, but I'm much more hopeful now.

I think the biggest lesson I've taken from the course so far is that learning requires time and focused attention. It sounds fairly common sense really, but it often seemed to me that people just remembered something after reading the textbook once, and it might be the case with some of them, but not everyone has photographic memory. I don't. So I need to take my time with it and not expect immediate results.

Attention is something that I struggle with, especially when I'm reading a textbook on my own. Today there is so much distractions everywhere, too many stimuli bombarding my brain from every direction. The only way to deal with it is actually to turn off any internet connection, switch off my laptop and put my Pomodoro timer on. Then for 25 minutes I just focus on whatever I want to do. 25 minutes  doesn't seem like enough, but really I get more than within those 25 focused minutes than I do during two hours of work distracted with flipping through pointless websites.

          

           

As for the books, The Memory Book gives a very helpful technique about remembering lists. I was aware of it, but never got it so clearly explained. The basic idea is that you need to create a very clear mental picture, as ridiculous as possible and link one item with another by way of such images. Although it's presented in the context of lists in the book, it can be used for other things, for example I started using it to remember what cases are about. My recent invention was to remember Pulhofer case which was about a test of a perverse factual finding by imagining an exhibitionist (pervert) in a pullover. Strong mental image. Plus using the technique of remembering names and new words: find a word that sounds similar.

Another thing I've realised is that attitude is very important. This is why I abandoned land law for now and instead started revising admin. It's much more common sense and there's simply less to get grips of, which means I can actually remember what I've learnt and in result become more positive about revision. Instead of feeling like a complete failure, now I feel like I'm completely capable of preparing for finals. It will take time, but I have over a year. It's enough time.

***

There are some interesting articles from around the web listed here, have a look, they give an interesting tips about how to learn:

• http://www.wsj.com/articles/the-power-of-the-doodle-improve-your-focus-and-memory-1406675744
• http://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2014/10/08/multitasking-damages-your-brain-and-career-new-studies-suggest/
• http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/3304496/Be-lucky-its-an-easy-skill-to-learn.html

I really hope this post will help people like me who feel overwhelmed or insufficient. You can do this! It's probably that you've never been told how to go about learning. But once you know, it'll become easier. I know from experience.

Doing it the Dutch way.

Year abroad is an excellent opportunity to make some anthropological observations. These observations even have a linguistic twist in them.

It appears that the Dutch do not have a phrase 'excuse me' (or sorry for that matter), in their vocabulary. After four years on a Small Island, a placed filled with these phrases to the brim, it was, and still is quite frankly, a rather shocking experience.

So if you want to go through a narrow passage which is obstructed by an unfortunate fellow human being, and if you want to do it the Dutch way, make sure you follow either of these two procedures:

1) mute option: approach the unfortunate fellow human being and stand next to him, very close. Crucially, don't make any sounds whatsoever. Just stand very close to the unfortunate human being and look rather absent-minded.

2) vocal option: if you would rather use your voice strings, embark on the task as in option 1: approach the unfortunate fellow human being and stand next to him, very close. This time, however, you are allowed to make a sound: 'aaaaa' or some similar expression of unidentified emotions. Absent-minded look also welcomed here.

After following either of the procedures, stand there hoping that the person obstructing your way can read your mind even when he cannot see you since he has his back turned to you and is engaged in some intellectually demanding activity which makes it impossible to him to register slight air disturbances when another person approaches. 

***

On a more serious note, this is actually bloody annoying. Don't people know how to use their mouth? I've conducted an experiment this evening: I was washing the dishes when a girl came in and grabbed a kettle. She then stood right next to me with a kettle, but haven't said a word. So I carried on my washing up, silently making bets with myself as to how long she would stand so uncomfortably close to me. Nothing changed for a while, and I started feeling rather weird with her by my side, so I asked whether she wanted to fill up her kettle. What a stupid question to be directed at a person standing with a kettle in her hand next to the sink! But I had no choice! How else could I remedy this situation when she would not use her words? I really don't get it, maybe the Dutch really read each others mind?

Breakfast dinner logistics.

Captain America seemed pretty excited about the concept of having breakfast for dinner and last night was the time to indulge in a delicious full English breakfast for dinner.

There's been quiet a few things that had to be prepared for this dinner: sausages, bacon, hash browns, tomatoes, eggs, toast and baked beans, so a proper action plan was necessary to make sure everything is ready when it was supposed to be.

Of course there's no picture of the dinner itself, I was too hungry and excited to take any pictures. But it was absolutely delicious and it has been actually quite relaxing to prepare it. The last time I made a full English was over a year ago I think, but then it was made for around 12 people if I remember correctly, so I guess it can be counted for a few times.

I did get weird looks when preparing baked beans, eggs and bacon at 7 pm though!

I've also had my first German pretzels adventure today. In the past yeast dough was not my favourite, but I'm getting grips of it now. Apparently real pretzels are dipped in lye solution (also known as sodium hydroxide), but after some deliberation, I've decided to try with bicarbonate soda instead. Firstly, it's much easier to find, secondly, not as poisonous, which is quite important given my clumsiness. These didn't turn out exactly like pretzels I have when I visit Munich, but it was my first attempt and I'll count it as a success (plus Captain America was absolutely delighted that I've finally made pretzels, so I can also place a tick next to making him happy box).

God help me.

Do you ever feel like you had absolutely enough? This was definitely me yesterday.

This year abroad has drained me a bit: it hasn't been intellectually challenging and I struggled to find some stimuli to avoid going mad, I still cannot comprehend the culture here, including terrible smoking habits, a lack of any sensitivity toward fellow human beings and an annoying assumption that you know ins and outs of everything, so no explanation of anything is ever given. Also, what sort of a person starts working outside your window (on the second floor I need to point out) at 8:20am? In any civilised country you are simply not allowed to start any noisy activity before 9am (or 10am, to be on the safe side). Here there's no sense of people simply wanting to sleep in the morning or to have a peaceful morning.

On the other hand, expect for those moments of complete frustration, I'm having such a good time here. Even the Dutch crudeness has it's good sides, since I can get away with saying things rather bluntly. The advantage is that taking a very direct approach ensures you are understood. If you say 'I think this is rather unpleasant to have you singing right outside my window when I'm trying to study', the message won't get through. It's another matter if instead you say 'Be quiet, your singing is awfully annoying.' In this case there's no doubt as to what message you try to convey. No linguistic complications. A clear message (which does sound a bit rude to me who is used to very polite manner, but here in NL it's a safer option).

***

It's only just over two months of classes! And even during these two months it's about 4 hours a week anyway, so I'll have plenty of time in between to have some fun (and revise, of course). After a bit of finals panic, I think I managed to calm myself down: it's over a year until I have to sit these exams so I'll just take my time and do whatever I can to sort myself out. Coming back to intellectually unchallenging courses here, being thrown out of the Oxford system was not pleasant, so I guess being thrown back into it will be a bit painful too, but apparently people after a year abroad get better results in finals, so...

In the world of tulips.

Today we made a trip to Keukenhof. This is a big garden about half an hour from Leiden, open from the end of March till mid-May and filled with tulips. Luckily, the weather was beautiful, so we enjoyed a good few hours there, just walking around, enjoying the sunshine and taking pictures of all those beautiful flowers. I think the pictures speak for themselves: Keukenhof is definitely worth a visit.

Rushing out of the house.

You know, I laughed at all of the Dutch who would flood the streets whenever even the smallest ray of sun would poke from behind the clouds.

I laughed, but after months of living here, I've done exactly the same thing.

Today was a beautiful day again but apart from the sun, we were also blessed with a rather high temperature. It felt like everyone who could decided to live the house. Including myself.

In this country where your life is a constant battle with rain and wind, the sunny spells are fully embraced and made most of. After a string of grim days you just crave some sun and it's impossible to resist the temptation to just abandon whatever you are doing and instead just sit on the grass by the canal and enjoy yourself.

So I rushed out of the house this afternoon in an attempt to hyper-dose myself with vitamin D. Almost like a real Leidener.

More than 10.

Have I already told you about my 10 item wardrobe plan?

Inspired by this talk, I thought 'what a brilliant idea!' Less clothes, but better quality. In general I try to have less, but live more, so a 10 item wardrobe seemed like something for me.

The idea is simple. For each season you have 10 basic items (a dress, skirt, trousers, shirts) which are of very good quality, so that they last long rather than looking like rubbish after one wash. Extra supplementary items are allowed, but you can't go overboard (10 basic items do not square with 100 pairs of shoes and boxes of jewelry).

I haven't actually execute this properly, but nonetheless I thought I was doing fine in terms of the number of clothes. Looking at my friends, especially female, with shelves overflowing with clothes they never wear, I thought I had a good sense of control in terms of buying things.

And then I've decided to fold all of my clothes nicely, so I took them out of the drawers and embarked onto the folding adventure which resulted in this:

As you can tell, even with a quick look this is more than 10 items. In fact, it is much more. 

In fact, I've counted 4 shirts, 5 jumpers, 1 pair of jeans, 5 dresses, 11 (sic!) skirts, 2 cardigans, not to forget probably around 10 tops and t-shirts. Clearly this is not good. Not when you want to have a neat 10 item wardrobe.

The thing is, I do wear these things. This is pretty much everything that I have. I have a all-year-long set of clothes and I'm not sure whether I can, or should reduce it any further. I've recently said goodbye to a pinkish purple cardigan as a sign of entering the adulthood (you don't look particularly mature in this shade of purple. Maybe I should say goodbye to a few skirts too, but I'll need to think it over. Skirts are really dear to me.

But this is something that I definitely need to work on, to reduce the amount of clothes I have to some more manageable number. Seems like a good goal for the rest of March, could probably be counted towards my spring cleaning.

A morning at Hortus.

Today is such a beautiful day! It's warm and sunny, the wind is not too bad, so given how scarce such days are here in the Netherlands, I've decided to do a bit of exploration today and went to Hortus: Leiden's botanic garden. Leiden lacks a big park in the city centre where I could go for a long walk, so Hortus proved perfect, especially that LU students can enjoy a free entry.

I like how I do have enough time to spend a few hours out in the park, without stressing out about deadlines, reading and all this stuff. I've just finished two out of five courses I'm taking this semester, and exams are in one month time, so my schedule will not be that tight now. And since it coupled with nice weather, I can finally enjoy Leiden.

Now enough talking, here come the pictures.

This is the Observatory, in which I also have some of the classes. Unfortunately, because the classes are cramped and most of them don't have proper tables but only chairs with ridiculously small folding 'desks'.

The blessing of open book exams.

I had my first open book exam in the upper sixth. It was a history exam on historical controversies, in particular witch-hunting in early modern Europe. I had a pile of books and my notes with me, but I haven't used these much: there wasn't enough time to skim through the pages and in any case I've read everything a couple of times, so most of it stuck to my memory anyway.

Oxford knows no concept of open book exams, unless you count in a statute book and a case list. This is why I was surprise to see so many open book exams at Leiden. Labour law, children's rights, IT law, EU competition law, 4 freedoms in the EU, aerospace law- for all of these I can bring in pretty much everything I want except electronic devices (not the case, quite appropriately in IT law course when I actually typed up my exam on my very own laptop). At first I wasn't really fond of those exams, thinking that they don't really reflect what people have learnt during the course. But now I've reconsidered my opinion and I think that actually such exams make much more sense as a way of testing law students.

What I've learnt by observing lawyers in their work is that they don't have all the legal knowledge in their heads. Admittedly it comes with practice: when you deal with a specific issue on daily basis the pieces of legislation and cases become somewhat burnt into your brain, but as for things that are untypical, you have infinite resources to consult: textbooks, journals, magazines, publications, guidelines etc. Most of which is accessible online. At the end of the day lawyers are not valued for how many quirky case facts they can remember or whether they can recite all relevant statutory provisions. Lawyers are valued for how their brains work.

I find it much more useful to have an exam where I can bring printed cases and articles, because then I don't need to stress out about remembering relevant details and instead can concentrate on applying what I know to the problem I need to solve. I still need to have at least a vague idea (or sometimes a rather specific idea, since, again, there is no time to look for information if you don't know what you're looking for) where to find what I need. Which provisions of the Treaty apply. Whether there is some case or a regulation. 

And although open book exams can be ridiculously easy, they can also be rather challenging. Everything depends on the type of questions asked. Not on the fact that you have your books with you.

What I've been doing wrong.

And what you probably do wrong sometimes too.

After receiving around 15 rejection from law firms I had to face the question: what the hell are you doing wrong, Kat? And so I did, and I even tried to find some answers to this baffling question. The answer didn't come as a result of a long logical process, but rather as a result of a moment of revelation which happened to me a few days ago.

Starting with a logical route, however, since I'm a logically thinking person liking logical processes with clearly defined steps, I thought that maybe the explanation to this string of failures is in the fact that I've sent an excessive number of applications and maybe didn't make any of them good enough? (well, they clearly weren't good enough given the rejections, but maybe a more specific reason can be found). You know, it happens to everyone, that you don't really answer the question, or you make terrible typos or just waffle a lot about nothing specific. This could be the reason, but I had two months to complete all these applications and I actually made an effort to make them tailored for particular law firms, I've done my research and everything, so I rejected this explanation, especially that I've actually managed to get two interviews (but here my adventure with these places finished).

The moment of revelation came one morning when I realised what the reason of my failures was. It's not that I'm not a lawyer material. I just don't really care about business, but I do care about people a lot. So aiming for strictly commercial firms makes no sense whatsoever! And the recruiters know I have no passion for multimillion transactions. But, on the other hand, I absolutely loved working in immigration law, because there I saw real people with problems I could actually very directly address. Working for charities, churches or other institutions acting for public good would be perfect

I've realised that if, by some unfortunate conjunction of stars, I ended up in a commercial firm, I would be really unhappy. I would probably bloody good at whatever area of law I would specialise in, I would not enjoy it.

So the search continues. In the attempt to make this world a little bit better place, I'm joining Teach First Insight Programme in June. I'm so looking forward to it, it really feels like my kind of thing. The future looks so much clearer now that I know what I've been doing wrong.

A person not disability.

I've shared this beautiful article from the BBC website on my Twitter account, but would like to also share a bit of my own thoughts on disability.

I remember when I was about 13 or 14 we went to the seaside with my mum and my brother and there were two girls with Down's Syndrome in the place we stayed at. For whatever reason they've taken a great interest in me and loved to dance with me. I though their faces were absolutely beautiful, especially that the girls always smiled and were so joyous. Then there was a paralysed boy with mental disability who claimed to love me. And a few girls at my school, also with learning disabilities, who I could calm down so easily. There's always been a very natural  way of communication between people with different kinds of difficulties and me.

It's been really painful to watch other people make fun of those with disabilities. Especially when it happens in places such as Oxford, where people are supposed to be smart. But, unfortunately, smart doesn't mean you don't act like a total douchebag. There was this boy with some disability which impaired his speech. It was difficult to understand him, yes, but is that a reason to laugh at him and treat him as an inferior human being? I don't think so. Did I speak up to stop this? No, I didn't have enough courage to say this was wrong. Probably now I'd be better equipped to deal with such situations: when I boil inside to the point of hurting but my lips are sealed with fear.

I'd like the world to see beyond disability. To see a person. Even if she speaks in a funny way, repeats the same sentence a hundred times or just looks a bit different. To be more like children who take a person as he is, without an expectation of a perfect, flawless model.