Juggling a Master's and a full-time job.

What a lovely way to spend a Saturday. Grocery shopping, putting together an IKEA storage system and spending hours reading educational journals.

Doing a masters degree is a challenge. Doing it while working full time is even more challenging.

I've done my PGCE while working, but it was very different: I didn't have a full teaching timetable at the time and my life was much less demanding in general. I've started my two-year part time course last year and I can already say that this year is much more challenging. I work more hours this year and I have very limited time that I can actually commit to focused for on my thesis.

By next September, I have to have my thesis completed regardless of work circumstances, however, so I had to quickly find ways of making it work. Part of it is simple organisation, part of it letting go of my ideas what studying should look like.

And so I've created a schedule. I love planning, so it was was an easy task for me. The key is to be both realistic and specific about what needs to be done. By Christmas, I should have my literature review ready (ha ha ha), but it is not a specific enough goal to have. So I broke it down into manageable weekly tasks: reading specific articles, books, calling my supervisor etc. It is not a perfect schedule and will evolve with time, but it gives me some structure to begin with.

Now I've also created a home office in the spare bedroom so that I have space dedicated exclusively to working, be it school work or MA work. I don't have a massive need to have a special room for work, I live on my own so I don't have many distractions here (bar a cupboard full of delicious tea and chocolate), but sitting in my little office puts me in the work mindset straight away.

Finally, I had to accept that whole day study sessions are not likely to happen this year. I might manage to spend a couple of days over half terms working on the thesis, but on the whole, it will be just using these little pockets of time here and there. I need to find my own rhythm. I usually have a little bit of time in the evening between dinner time and relaxation, so I use that time to read an article or think about my ideas (I sit around thinking a lot. And talking to myself). But this is probably my biggest struggle at the moment. I'm used to long stretches of time dedicated to studying or writing and I don't get many of those now. But the only way to do it is to make it work.

I must say I have a love-hate relationship with this Masters programme: it's yet another thing that I need to do think about and schedule into the week, but at the same time I really enjoy reading articles and learning about new perspectives on the Mathematics curriculum. I know that this is probably the best time to do it, before my careers becomes even more demanding and before I become a mother; and I will benefit immensely from it in terms of my professional and personal development. But for all of you out there thinking about studying part time and working full time at the same time: it's not  piece of cake. But you can do it with plenty of cake at hand.

Enough, back to juggling now. :)

Back to school.

I've survive my first week in school! Although survive might not be the best word to describe my experience, since I've actually loved every minute of it.

It was a really busy few days, filled with running around to sort my classroom out, trying to get my IT equipment to work, frantically printing out stuff for classes I forgot about, learning how to use SIMS and a thousand different little bits and pieces that I need every day to get through those few hours of the day without a major hiccup.

My classroom has undergone a little transformation: the tables are in rows rather than pods and some stuff gone up onto the display boards. I'm doing my best not to clutter the room, I know that it can be difficult to concentrate if you have a lot of stuff going on on the walls around you. So I'll try to keep it simple. I have a few quotes about mistakes around the room, I want my students to embrace making mistakes.

I've taught six lessons and met four out of five of my classes. It's amazing how much you learn on the job. I now know where the more naughty ones sit, that there are a few who try to go by without doing any work, so I need to give them a little nudge. I must say that children constantly amaze me. In my first lesson with year 7s, we had a discussion about whether there is the first (or the last) number and whether one is a prime number. Not bad for a bunch of 11 year olds. I've also taught them how the binary system works and was surprise how many of them really wanted to learn, persisting until they've understood the process. I must say that my year 7s seem to be very different from some of my year 8s who just give up when they see something unfamiliar. I really hope that I will manage to change it during this year so that they start to love the unfamiliar, embrace challenge and stretch themselves.

If I were to describe my levels of tiredness now, I would say that it's like nothing I've experience before. It's probably because I actually need to be attentive every single moment of the lesson: no drifting away, thinking about what to cook for dinner or any such thing. Just full attention for a full hour when I have the students with me. Emotional investment also comes in here. I care so much and want my students to succeed so badly, that it drains energy, especially when something goes wrong. And, my word, so many things went wrong in the last couple of days. I had to send pupils out of my classroom, stop the entire lesson to have a serious chat about attitude to work and I've almost lost my voice trying to be heard over their chatter. 

It definitely feels like a learning curve, but I know it will be absolutely amazing. There is no better way to spend your time than to educate young minds.

I did it!

Today at 13:03 I've received a long awaited email with my examination results.

I'm super proud of myself, especially that I struggled so much during the revision period. But I did it! By hard work and thanks to an overflow of support from Mr Magic and all my friends. I wouldn't have done it without them. They've encouraged me, believed in me all the way through, even when I saw no hope for tomorrow, when I sobbed miserably in the library and refused to get out of bed. They were there for me all this time, even when I was super annoying and didn't want them around. I'm so blessed having such wonderful people around me.

A lesson from this? Never give up. It might sound like a cliche, but it's true. You might need people to carry you through (or push you through) certain parts of the journey, as it happened with me, but you can do more than you think. I'm probably nowhere near my limits yet. It is scary to explore them, yes. It might seem like you can never progress. But you can! With a little faith.

Another lesson from my exam struggle is that you need to be brave enough to ask for help. Ask around, ask as many people as you think is necessary until you get the support you need. Sadly people cannot read your mind and from personal experience I can say that hiding the emotional turmoil going on inside of you is relatively easy, so you need to reach out to people who care about you. Otherwise you will be left all alone. And it's really not the happiest place to be.

And so the university chapter of my life is nearly complete. Only graduation left now, that's at the end of the month, and it will be it. Can't believe how quickly the time flown by. It's absolutely incredible. But I'm ready to move on to another challenge.

I think I deserve a star sticker now.