Bloody Americans.

I've been warned, right? They've told me there will be an excessive number of Americans in Leiden.

What I haven't expected was that I'd actually end up hanging out with Americans.

And now I spend my days trying to get into their heads how to pronounce English words correctly. Or which words to use.

Tuna. Basil. Biscuit. Washing powder. Queue. Fringe.

It's absolutely amazing how we are supposed to speak the very same language, but we end up saying different things, though actually meaning the same. Sort of. My horizons suddenly expanded in an unexpected direction. I must say it's somewhat disturbing, I thought I'm fairly fluent in English, even when it comes to colloquialisms, but damn not, still have soooo much to learn. The most recent word I've learnt is crunked, which quite frankly sounds as if someone tried to say cracker with a stuffed nose and an aching tooth. Anyway, apparently this word will come in handy soon (beware!), which I'm ready to believe after years spent  in student accommodation. Getting crunked seems like a perpetual state here.

So yes, I'm spending my days trying to stick to proper English. And putting up with the American way of being (loud and overly expressive (passionate?), as I see it). So far, I absolutely love it. Especially that my Englishness is magnified around them. As of yet my inner introvert hasn't been driven crazy, probably thanks to drinking excessive quantities of tea. Only tea can keep me sane now.

Size mini.

I have small breasts. And I'm absolutely fine with that. I had a bit of a  shaky attitude towards it as the end of primary school when I insisted on buying bras in sizes far too large for me. This sort of continued into the middle school, although much less so. 

So I'm fine with my small breasts. Quite frankly I'm rather fond of them.

But lingerie producers are not, apparently.

So I go to a shop and look at bras. There are some pretty ones, with lace, sparkling little diamonds and other fancy features. When I'm already all too excited that I've found my size, I constantly discover yet another wonderful feature.

Push-up. 

Sometime also a plunge version with even more push-up.

Seriously?

Do I look like someone who wants to pretend my breasts are ten times bigger than they really are?

Seriously?

As in, the bigger the better?

Somehow I don't think so. I'm quite content with my body, including my breasts. Indeed, I can also point to a number of advantages of having size mini, but I won't bother you with these, look to the right if you wish. --->

Anyway, I'm not happy. I would like to be able to enjoy beautiful lingerie without enhancing the looks of my chest (or shipping proper bras from the States for that matter). It's so simple. I'm alright with what I have, and I don't need any improvements. And that's all there is to it!

September 17

Exactly 21 years ago, at 2:30 in the afternoon CET on 17th September I came to this world.

I've scored 10 Apgar points and had a good outlook for the future.

Since then my life has been a bit of a rocky road really.

I've spent six years at a music primary school that I've absolutely hated, only to rediscover my love for music a couple of years later.

Middle school was full of drama in the middle of which I inadvertently ended up being. My word, this was 

One year in a Polish high school has passed without much firework, maybe part from taking part in a Christmas concert when I surprised everyone by actually getting onto the stage and singing in public.

And then two years at a girl's school. This was... fun, in a way, a bit strange, and at moments emotionally draining, but I would do it all again (maybe apart a few stupid things). Definitely would do it all again.

When it come to uni, I had the most crazy first term, but later I've settled pretty well. In fact I've settled in my own room so well that some people haven't seen me for weeks or months on end.

And now I'm here, turning 21. With a bottle of Chilean red and some marzipan chocolate to accompany me.

At 21 my granny, mum and aunt all already had children. I have no prospects of any such accomplishment as of yet.

I'm probably about a quarter into my life (hopefully!) and I wonder when I'm going with it and I honestly don't know. I have a pretty good idea of what I want to do career-wise, but what besides it?

My granny said the most important thing is to have an interesting life, but I cannot complain about it. My life has been ridiculously interesting. So maybe I'm actually on a right path?

Two weeks on: things they don't tell you

Before the four of us headed off to Netherlands, we've got a number of instructions and friendly advice.

We were told that nothing gets done quickly and we need to be extremely patient.

We were told that a bike is a necessity and no one wears helmets because it just looks too daft.

We were also told that there would be little work to do compared to Ox and that we would really enjoy this year.

We were told to prepare for proper seasons, bring warm coats for winter and summer dresses for summer.

But there are certain things that we were not told.

Like how to stop a bus. I mean, this is important, right? Do you wave your hand or is it considered rude? Is it enough to press a 'stop' button on a bus or do I need to do something else too if I want to get off?

Or where to get proper coconut milk from. This is a major issue if you want to make something Thai.

Or where the recycling bins are (the answer is that there are none, just if you wonder).

Or where to get cheap wine glasses from just in case you manage to break the ones you've brought with you.

All this actually useful stuff that they haven't told us...

Enjoy the moment.

Yesterday I had to collect some remaining bits and pieces from the storage facility outside the town, so I've decided to take a bus (cycling with a big plastic box is not fun at all).

Buses in Leiden are not frequent and on my way back I've ended up waiting at the bus stop for about 15-20 minutes.

After 10 minutes I've got rather irritated. I've had so much to do and I had to be stuck there at the bus stop in the middle of nowhere, doing nothing productive- not something that I enjoy.

And then I reflected.

I thought that instead of getting irritated, I may well enjoy the moment. The sun was shining beautifully and it was just a perfect day. It was really a moment when I remembered how important appreciating little things is - because every moment is important.

Culture shock? What culture shock?

So when I visited some websites dedicated to year abroad people I've laughed at pages on dealing with culture shock. I mean, I was going to Netherlands. It's in Europe. It's not a Third World country. And I've been here before a few times. What culture shock could I possibly get?

And then it turns out it's not so simple. The culture shock somehow has happened. Maybe not so much as it might have if I went to some exotic country, and yet.

First shock came about when everything progressed really slowly. If time is money, the Dutch must be very rich. It might be just my bad luck, but I've encountered one of the worst customer services ever (apart the one in the Town Hall, they were absolutely brilliant).

Another shocking thing was that everyone looks the same here. I mean the natives. The guys all wear the same kind of clothes and excessive quantity of gel on their shoulder-length hair. This looks really ridiculous. And the girls also wear the same sort of clothes. In Oxford you can meet people with green hair, blue hair, wearing something hippie, or dressed completely in black, or wearing some sort of traditional outfit. Nothing like this appears here. This is really strange for me. And it makes me unnecessarily anxious about what I wear.

And then there is a fact that everyone speak Dutch, which is sometimes rather intimidating, because I can only understand single words. When I've arrived in Rotterdam a week ago, I stopped in the middle of the station hall and hearing all those unfamiliar sounds I though: 'Kat, you're completely mad, what are you doing here, honestly.' And I still feel like that, though I'm trying to pull myself together to actually use some of the Dutch I know, limited as it is. But it's hard.

One last thing: everyone drives and cycles on the right. You think that it shouldn't be a problem for me as a Pole, but believe, I got so used to the left side traffic, that I actually did try to cycle on the left (not a good idea when there are other bikes and cars approaching from the opposite) and still need to keep shouting at myself that I'm supposed to look LEFT not right.